John Edwards pinch hits

Thanks to a democrat insider buddy at work, we got blue tickets to see Kerry at a rally in Cedar Rapids. A blue ticket means you get to stand closer to the stage, or get better seats at an event (yeehaw). It turned out that Kerry had lost his voice and needed heal up for the debates, so John Edwards subbed. I was happy, as I had not seen him in person (but had seen Kerry). The event was at the US Cellular Center, which seems like it might be a decent place to see an arena band (although the list of those I'd see is short). As we waited in line, a guy in fatigues held up a sign saying something about Kerry being a liar about Viet Nam. I guess the soldiers did not burn down villages and collect ears... The wierd part was when the police showed up and arrested him. Apparently, that part of the sidewalk is private property and he had been warned to move across the street with the other people wanting other people to vote against their interests, but it was still creepy to see someone arrested for quietly protesting. Granted, his pockets were filled with scary trinkets from the local army surplus store, but I didn't think he was out to hurt anyone. People in line told me that 2 teachers were arrested at the same place before the last Bush rally... or did they just forget to sign their loyalty oath? The scarriest part was the dude across the street holding up anti-Kerry signs. I didn't notice him much until his wife arrived with a baby and two toddlers. He had the kids holding up signs with typical hateful republican diatribe. This kids were probably 5 to 7 years old. It was really creepy. Once in, we opted for seats rather than getting a closer view, as we've stood for hours at past rallies (only to hear a cheesy political speech in the rain...even when I agree with them, the speeches are cheesy). The rally opened with local jazz that I hope is more enjoyable in a club and a version of the national anthem that made me heave. Not to discredit the skills of the singer, but I'm sort of a traditionalist for this tune, especially when sung by a caucasian...these female country singers who think they have a lot of soul especially piss me off. They sound like the wretched Christina Aguilera mixed with that fucking Stepford Wife Laura Bush, warping 82 sylables out of every word, all with a country accent. See, while I hate this horribly corrupt administration, I am a patriot, and I'm that rare lefty who likes the Star Spangled Banner (especially since it is based on an old drinking song). If you're going to take liberties, you better be awesome, otherwise, stick to the script!!



Carole King came out next, playing a grand piano and with only one guitar player to back her up. She put on a pretty good show, but more importantly, I googled her (he he) and you'd be amazed how many famous songs she's written. If you check out what albums her songs have appeared on, there are two pages just for the one's starting with "A." When the pretty boy did finally arrive, he was certainly that. In fact, here is him describing John Ashcroft's penis! The whole room was drippy, by my assessment of the gazes of all the women in the room. Believe me, this dude has the charisma to be a president (Edwards-Obama in 2012?). He gave a great, non-wimpy speech and yet still kept positive. I can't wait to see the debate between him and the bridge troll that is our Vice President. I'm hoping Kerry will also rip Monkey Boy a new one...of course, it seems that all Bush has to do is show up and not completely sound like an idiot and he wins. Pretty scary...